15. Creating Capacity Beyond Your Circumstances: Investments in Well-Being, Family and Your Salon Business

Capacity is the ability or capability to hold space. This can be for deep conversations, different opinions or new ideas. It can also be the mental or physical aptitude to do something such as learn, process trauma, stress or perform tasks. Our bodies have a certain capacity based on several factors and can break down with repetition, which is especially common in the salon service industry. When you have had the experience of learning what you enjoy the most, you can choose to elevate and refine.

Our circumstances don't need to keep us stuck. It's the willingness to see this as a part of the human experience. We can choose our WHY or NORTH STAR. I changed my mindset when I had the help of multiple guides that could show me a different shorter path of alignment. I don't want you to take the long road and miss out on the joy of the journey. I want you to feel fulfillment daily. The people you choose to spend time with affect these results, so choose wisely.

In This Episode:

-Do you need help being the example you desire and want others to reciprocate? 

-Experience true well-being, more joyful family moments & a fulfilling business?

-Desire support from a like hearted community of other business owner moms 

-Save time by having a guide show you what the next best steps are?

Resources for this episode:

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Transcript

Sarah Swift 0:10

Welcome to the Integrative Mother Experience Podcast. I'm your host, Sarah Swift, wife for twenty-seven years and mother of three teenagers. I want to have conversations about why so many mamas wearing multiple hats, working, serving others, or owning a business, especially in the beauty industry, feel like they need to choose between their work and their family. We'll also uncover common causes of overwhelm, lack of wellbeing, and joy. I am here with over three decades of experience working in the beauty industry, owning several types of businesses starting in my twenties, and sharing stories to help other mothers avoid feeling that they're always missing out. Time is an asset we can't get back. I can't wait to dive into these deep conversations. I hope you will join me. Don't forget to check out my free checklist for joy and fulfillment on my website, theintegrativemotherexperience.com. Hello, beautiful mamas. Today we're going to be talking about the word capacity. Yes, the word capacity as in to love, hold space, see beyond your circumstances, help others, forgive others, and be able to receive. So let's dive in. So as many of you know, for the last five years or so, I've been working on building a stronger foundation. I've made lots of changes in my business and in my life, and I've created more space. So the space now is able to hold time in the morning for my rituals, my journaling, my gratitude time spent with God, my coffee ritual, as many of you know, and my schedule, my schedule, including working behind the chair as a hairstylist, working in my office with the business roles, the multiple business roles that I have in both my salon business and in my new business, and the space for my husband so we can have date nights conversations, my children and. Everything that I want to be able to offer to my friends and family and community beyond these areas. So when we allow great results, when things are easy, then when things are hard and life events happen, which they will if they haven't already, that just is part of this experience. We are able to have the capacity to do less better what we are already working on. So this is one thing that I am just incredibly proud of, is I took what I had been doing for such a long period of time and I refined it and I made it what it needed to be in order to give back and to give better. And change can be a good thing. When you refine something, you can learn to enjoy the moments, the joyful moments throughout every day because they're here, whether you notice them or not. And if you're not able to pause to even recognize them, then you're just missing out, and I didn't wanna miss out anymore, so things had to change. And all the things that I've done, it started with a lot of information and changes in my business, and then it evolved to the beginning of me actually going deeper in my spiritual and wellbeing, mindsets and habits, and now just the lifestyle that I live. That has allowed me to also earn more by doing less better. And that is something that I want for all of you if we want to actually live our lives not rushing around, not sacrificing, not just doing. Then we need to make changes. And when you're experiencing a personal trauma or a loss, can you still actually give to others or do you just shut down? Those are the questions you need to ask yourself. Because I know for me, it started when I had a huge loss and it was unexpected. And the lesson that I've learned. Is it took me down this journey I needed to start, which I have now built upon and refined, and my boundaries aren't blurred anymore. I'm able to receive, but you can't do that if you can't recognize where you're depleted. And being able to give to others from that place of depletion isn't serving anyone. I now have the compassion to do both, give and receive, and this is in my business and in my personal life. I see things so differently that you can't unknow what you know and when you've experienced things, they become either a lesson and a blessing or something that you just shove down or consider a negative aspect of your life, or maybe you think it shouldn't have happened to you, but I can really say that everything that I've been working on really prepared me for what I experienced last year, which was an unexpected trauma. And so I'm grateful for these things and. My understanding that maybe when your parents or your partner or some of your friendships or work relationships aren't what you want or need them to be, that really they just haven't built the structure. And I've been there and I understand that now, and it can be to varying degrees, of course. But people don't know what they don't know, and sometimes they know it and they just don't have the capacity to live it out. So I am here as your guide, as your example, wanting you to have the best experience you can possibly have as a mom and in your business. And therefore being able to serve others from a place of overflow. So if people don't know how to reset throughout the day, they're just going to continue to keep doing from a place of doing and not be able to see the little joyful moments that are there for the taking. In this new journey for me, I'm just so grateful. I am coming from a place of, I'm taking on another aspect in my life because I created the space to actually have some fun and to be creative again, and I love it. I've been in the beauty industry for over 32 years, and I'm starting a podcast. It's not a quick dopamine hit, it's not just a social media post. Millions of podcasts are out there, but not many are active. Around 90% quit by the 10th episode and there's something called Pod Fade by the seventh episode. So by, by no means am I doing this because it's easy. I'm doing this because it feels like a calling where I can help the people that I'm meant to help. And I'm here to do less better for the right people, the people that need and want my help and want to join my community. And in the beauty industry, they told us in beauty school that a huge portion of our class would quit by the time we graduated, and that ended up being true for my class. A huge percent of hairstylists in the beauty industry aren't even in the industry years down the road. That's very true for the people that I know that have been hairstylists in the past, tried it for a period of time. There are so many of them that are not doing it anymore, and I don't believe in forcing and pushing something that doesn't feel like it's a fit. But I do believe that there are hard things in our industry, just like there are hard things about being a mom. There's hard things about being married and being in a relationship. So when we refine the things that we start and we really start to create the space to try new things and to be able to schedule things into your work week. Then you are not on the hamster wheel anymore, and you can do what matters most. Now I'm able to prioritize my own wellbeing and I can give back by pouring into the relationships with my husband, with God, my children, and my business. So what I desire is I want to continue to be the example. I want to be that example for my children. Show them that they don't need to go out and keep burning out. Show them that they can hold the space for their needs, even when it's difficult. And boy has it been difficult lately, and I still was able to create the space that my children needed from me this year, despite everything that was going on. I was still able to serve my business because I knew what to do and what to say in order to be able to care for my needs and have the capacity to do the tasks that still needed to be performed, and I curated those boundaries. What I want to allow, is what I desire to come in at this point, and I also recognize that what doesn't belong for the greater good and what doesn't feel like it's easy and supportive. I don't have to force it anymore. I don't want to force the relationships. I don't want to force the outcomes either, because honestly, at this point in my fifties, I'm willing to let people know when their behavior is inappropriate or not appreciated. And not appreciated, is in my business and in my personal life. There's a feeling of steadiness that I now have, and my family can start to feel it because I'm not all over the place anymore. I'm not just constantly doing and serving to the point where I'm so depleted that I don't have anything to give back. And I've built this muscle in the last few years and I would love to be able to help you do the same. There's so much knowledge out there now, and there are things that we need to know as a business owner. But it's really when we have this capacity to hold space for ourself and others that we can do it at a level where it's refined and it's really serving. So we're going to go over the takeaways, and if this is something that you feel like you need help with, I really hope that you'll join my community. I want to start with saying joyful moments. They're there every day. So if you notice them and you're actually taking time to reset, you can actually experience them. Support from someone who has had success. Being the example that you desire. I now can say I do less better, and I am the example because I'm living the life that I had desired and I did the work. And I am here to guide anyone that wants to do that. If you no longer want to feel alone, start by joining my community. You can grab my free checklist and you can find that on my website at the integrative mother experience.com. Until next time, my beautiful mamas, have a blessed day. Thank you so much for joining me today. If you found this episode helpful, please follow or subscribe to the Integrative Mother Experience on Spotify, Apple Podcast, or wherever you listen so you're notified about the new episodes coming up. Please also take the time to leave me a review. This really does help me. I would love to see your beautiful faces. If you want to take a screenshot of this episode, I would love it. Tag me on Instagram or Facebook at timewithsarahswift, period between the word time on Instagram, so then I can re-share your post. You can also start today by grabbing my free checklist and check out some of my favorite things on my website, theintegrativemotherexperience.com. Until next time, my beautiful mamas, thank you so much.